Great Last Weekend
We really lived it up last weekend! I got to spend time with family, soak in the pool, visit with some horses, and have a romantic date night. It really was a perfect ending to my first chemo cycle. I knew that was the best I was going to feel and I just wanted to feel normal for those last few days. I’m so glad I did and we’ve decided we’ll have these special weekends each time I’m about to start my next round of chemo. During this process I’m learning it’s important to have something to look forward to. Now I know the symptoms will subside after the first week past chemo so I know I’ll have 1 good week each month where I will have more energy and feel good. I’m trying to focus on short term goals and small wins. Each day is one day closer to being done with all this crap but if I think in terms of months or years it becomes really overwhelming and daunting. I don’t like to think about having 4-6 more months of chemo or 2 more years till I can put my hair in a ponytail or 3 years until I can stop the yearly scans. So last weekend was definitely a win in my book.
Saturday morning I was even feeling well enough to make chocolate chip cookies with the kids. During quarantine we’ve tested SEVERAL different recipes to find a new favorite and we certainly have. It’s really important to keep making memories - I don’t want my kids to think of me as their sick mom who only lays on the couch all day - as comfortable as my couch may be. I’m so proud of them for not looking at me any differently and for loving me without fear. Harrison keeps telling me that we only have to wait for Christmas because he’s going to ask Santa to cure my cancer. Oh, and if my cancer is already gone by then, he’ll ask to cure Corona.
We then headed over to my mom’s house for pool time and a family dinner. I got to spend time with both of my sisters Sammy and Heather as well as my mom Gretchen, brother-in-law Andy, niece Riley, nephews Trent and Owen, step-dad Cabot, and Grandma Marilyn. It was such a treat to be feeling good and get some sun see everyone.
Sunday started with yet another doctors appointment to get blood drawn and get my PIC line dressing changed and then we headed down to Coto De Caza Equestrian Center to visit with our amazing babysitter Kylie, who has become a wonderful friend, and have the kids ride her horse Larry. We all had a blast! The kids have never ridden anything more than the ponies at the fair, so riding a real horse was such a cool experience. We visited with several horses there and they were all so sweet and so great with kids. We got to bush them and feel them carrots too. We also got to play with Kylie’s new puppy Maple! I look forward to getting to go back and continue to make more memories for the kids. We’re so lucky to have all of these amazing people offering their support to us in this time.
We ended our Sunday night by taking the kids back to my moms to have dinner with their cousins Max, Lizzy, Abby, and Owen & (Great) aunts Piper and Robin and go swimming while Eric and I got to sneak away for a romantic dinner on the water. We went to The Rusty Pelican in Newport and it was awesome. It had been months since our last date night and I even got to try out the new hair. I need to get more confident about it because I swear I could feel people looking at me or whispering about my wig - but maybe it was just my imagination. I’m sure I’ll get more comfortable with it in time.
This was a perfect weekend to wrap up my first full chemo cycle and put me in a good head-space to prepare for the week ahead. All of this gives me hope that things are working and I will have better days and progress is being made - which is a big bucket of win in my eyes.
